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  1. Akward Blues

Lyrics

Akward Blues

My vocal tone has a mind of its own and I squeak when I try to sing baritone
My feet just have the hardest time wherever I try to roam
They’ve a peculiar predeliction to a particular direction
They’ve an affinity to wander from the South up to the vicinity of my mouth
I’d love to make a cool advance, but I know I haven’t got a chance
If I ask a pretty girl to dance something’s bound to get broken
When I fall down on my ass if it’s not my heart it’s a cocktail glass
The dancers gravitate toward the door when they see me agitate the hardwood floor
I’m always ducking when I should be dodging hodging when I should be podging


No matter how I try I’m a stranger in this world
I’m just too girly for the guys too hairy for the girls
My hem’s too long I go ‘round trippin’ all the time
I try to shift my gears sweet mama but all they do is grind

No matter how I try I just can’t get it right
My lips are always way too loose my clothes are always much too tight
I’ve wanted nothing more than to blend in with the crowd
But before I stop to think sweet mama I’m sayin’ it out loud

No matter how I try I just can’t get it right
I always go in thinking big I always come out quite contrite….

I’m always ducking when I should be dodging
Hodging when I should be podging
Drinking when I should be dry
Feeling low down when I should be high
Talking smack when I should be silent
Giving peace a chance when I could be violent
Staying up late when I oughta be in bed
Dancing to the jingle going jangle in my head